when it rains, there's a good chance it's gonna pour.
i'm not just talking about the weather, which, strangely enough, has been rainy and poury these past few days. as it is summer in my beautiful country, rain isn't exactly something i - and everyone else, for that matter - am used to. we're more accustomed to the awful heat and terrible suffocating humidity that summer is usually associated with. the rain is always welcome, though, as it means cooler days/nights and less prickly icky heat.
anyway, it's drizzled a bit in my life, too. couple days ago i got a text message that totally uplifted me from my current slump, and today it's drizzled a bit again.
the first one today was a pretty welcome one. the second one i had to avoid. i didn't HAVE to, but i felt that i should. if i've learned anything these past few months, it's that keeping faith is very important. so i will. it's been four months anyway, what's a couple days more? :)
so, it's been raining and i'm very thankful, really. i don't want to get ahead and think that it's going to pour, because i'm not sure of that, and getting my umbrella up at this point will be a bit too much, i think.
blazers and leather jackets ought to be enough.
and at P227 each, now THAT... is LOVE.
p.s. i just realized that my "i am the rain goddess" theory is still pretty intact. haha.
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Sunday, April 19, 2009
i dont want to get ahead of myself but...
just when i bitch about things not falling into place just yet, God decides to surprise me.
and just like THAT! ... i'm fine again. :)
i hope i don't jinx it this time. :D
and just like THAT! ... i'm fine again. :)
i hope i don't jinx it this time. :D
Saturday, April 18, 2009
no more starbucks nights
These past few days I've been avoiding my house like it was out to get me and gobble me up for dinner.
For one thing, it's a stupid house, the first floor having windows only on the front part, with no other windows anywhere else (but surprisingly it's still cooler than upstairs which has more windows but it always feels like a sauna room up there). And with the awful awful summer heat in the Philippines, chances are I'd die faster of suffocation in my house than of heat stroke standing outside under the flesh-burning heat of the sun.
Another reason, is that my mom and I are, yes, still at it, her with her hormones and I with my temper (and hormones, too, as I am pre-menstrual, I feel it, yes, I do). And once more she's been locking me out of the house and throwing small things around and irritating me to a/an I'm-just-going-to-get-out-of-here-instead-of-making-patol-you point (excuse the conioness of that).
Anyway.
Yesterday I went to the doctor to have my left wrist checked. For a while it's been shit crazy painful, and my hand being the most important part of my life/profession/future, of course I needed to have it checked. It's tendinitis (more commonly tendonitis), so it's just tired.
Okay I don't know why I even said that.
Anyway, today, escape meant going to Dee's and playing with China, her 4-year old niece, who I adore, until she screams in my ear and kicks me like it's not supposed to hurt. Anyway I had fun, and I think they were all kinda thankful that someone else was there to divert her attention, or that someone else got the kicking. Still, thanks Dee, for letting me crash, and turning on the airconditioning, and for dinner, too.
We were supposed to grab some Starbucks with Vicky, but her car broke down and she fell asleep so Dee and I just had dinner, and since I'm always broke these days, Dee offered. I'll pay her back as soon as I get around to withdrawing some money.
Anyway I think the whole point of this post was to say that it's kinda "sad"(pardon me for lack of better term) that we three rarely have time to get together at Starbucks (which, though I am supposed to be boycotting for my sister and for many other obvious reasons, have come to be our trio's special place). Its probably because of a couple dozen valid excuses, but mine is basically because I have no money to spare on those extremely-fattening, mouth-watering, over-priced drinks; and not being able to makes me feel that my world is going into a downward spiral, bringing about a sudden rush of self-pity, low self-worth, and generally a huge black hole of sadness.
It's been a mighty big help, all the positivity I've been injecting myself with (purely figurative), and this caramel sundae my sister just handed me.
(Eating caramel goodness pause.)
Still, positivity has this thing about running out like really good stocks at the mall, and at some point in time you go back to being pessimistic, which, strangely enough, is always, always just there to help.
I'm currently working on that, and hoping that this - all this - is just a bad case of pre-period hormones going berserk.
P.S. Obviously, things are not in place just yet. (See previous entry.) Exactly why pessimism is peeping around again.
For one thing, it's a stupid house, the first floor having windows only on the front part, with no other windows anywhere else (but surprisingly it's still cooler than upstairs which has more windows but it always feels like a sauna room up there). And with the awful awful summer heat in the Philippines, chances are I'd die faster of suffocation in my house than of heat stroke standing outside under the flesh-burning heat of the sun.
Another reason, is that my mom and I are, yes, still at it, her with her hormones and I with my temper (and hormones, too, as I am pre-menstrual, I feel it, yes, I do). And once more she's been locking me out of the house and throwing small things around and irritating me to a/an I'm-just-going-to-get-out-of-here-instead-of-making-patol-you point (excuse the conioness of that).
Anyway.
Yesterday I went to the doctor to have my left wrist checked. For a while it's been shit crazy painful, and my hand being the most important part of my life/profession/future, of course I needed to have it checked. It's tendinitis (more commonly tendonitis), so it's just tired.
Okay I don't know why I even said that.
Anyway, today, escape meant going to Dee's and playing with China, her 4-year old niece, who I adore, until she screams in my ear and kicks me like it's not supposed to hurt. Anyway I had fun, and I think they were all kinda thankful that someone else was there to divert her attention, or that someone else got the kicking. Still, thanks Dee, for letting me crash, and turning on the airconditioning, and for dinner, too.
We were supposed to grab some Starbucks with Vicky, but her car broke down and she fell asleep so Dee and I just had dinner, and since I'm always broke these days, Dee offered. I'll pay her back as soon as I get around to withdrawing some money.
Anyway I think the whole point of this post was to say that it's kinda "sad"(pardon me for lack of better term) that we three rarely have time to get together at Starbucks (which, though I am supposed to be boycotting for my sister and for many other obvious reasons, have come to be our trio's special place). Its probably because of a couple dozen valid excuses, but mine is basically because I have no money to spare on those extremely-fattening, mouth-watering, over-priced drinks; and not being able to makes me feel that my world is going into a downward spiral, bringing about a sudden rush of self-pity, low self-worth, and generally a huge black hole of sadness.
It's been a mighty big help, all the positivity I've been injecting myself with (purely figurative), and this caramel sundae my sister just handed me.
(Eating caramel goodness pause.)
Still, positivity has this thing about running out like really good stocks at the mall, and at some point in time you go back to being pessimistic, which, strangely enough, is always, always just there to help.
I'm currently working on that, and hoping that this - all this - is just a bad case of pre-period hormones going berserk.
P.S. Obviously, things are not in place just yet. (See previous entry.) Exactly why pessimism is peeping around again.
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